When reality reflects The Onion (redux)

[Justin Tonation]

Louie "Terror Babies" Gohmert proposes banishing gays to an island to prove same-sex marriage is unnatural

Tea Partyer calls for island isolation study to see "what nature dictates should be a marriage"

And teh gayz said "Oh no..., not that...,"

[ye-ole-hatch ıll|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llıl]

^^haven't they been doing cruises like this for years?

[betao]

Washington man arrested after bizarre standoff involving banjo

http://q13fox.com/2015/07/27/washington-man-arrested-after-bizarre-standoff-involving-banjo/

Neighbors saw the man, identified by police as Andrew Helmsworth, yelling at officers, and said at one point, Helmsworth walked outside with a banjo, which he played for the officers.

[DeathFromAbove1979]

^^haven't they been doing cruises like this for years?

"Sorry, sir. They don't allow us to take pictures here."

[Julian, Forum COGNOSCENTI]

Police search for aggresive turkey that's terrorizing University of Michigan's campus

(Not a euphemism for Dave Brandon, it's about an actual turkey.)

[grateful]

DEWEY TO DISCUSS BAR VIOLENCE AT SPECIAL TOWN MEETING

After two recent violent bar brawls at the North Beach/Ivy complex, Dewey Beach police received assistance this past week with additional state resources. State troopers along with Alcohol & Tobacco Enforcement agents were assigned to the town. Furthermore, the town also sought assistance from DelDOT to provide light trailers to help brighten the dimly lit streets.

This past Saturday, to encourage a more peaceful crowd, the deejay was going to play 1980's music. Police report no fights and no confrontations with the officers, both during the week and weekend.

Last summer, North Beach had trouble with the $1 drink specials on Tuesday nights which were followed by violence during closing time. The Saturday before last was the first time the violence spread to a weekend night, possibly because of a change of music.

[DeathFromAbove1979]

^^^^^^^^^^ Jesus Christ hahahahaha

[ye-ole-hatch ıll|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llıl]

Were they playing Lighthouse and that's what got the kids so rowdy?
I know that would incite me to violent acts, already hit a few coworkers this morning

and 80's music, I assume it wasn't the CroMags, Suicidal Tendencies, COC and Black Flag to calm the crowd down

[grateful]

Male Michigan lawmaker (R) tries to distract attention from his affair with a female Michigan lawmaker (R) by leaking fake emails suggesting he hooked up with a male prositute.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/acts-of-faith/wp/2015/08/07/a-michigan-state-rep-reportedly-tried-to-fake-a-male-prostitution-scandal-to-hide-his-relationship-with-another-republican-state-rep/

[Justin Tonation]

Male Michigan lawmaker (R) tries to distract attention from his affair with a female Michigan lawmaker (R) by leaking fake emails suggesting he hooked up with a male prositute.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/acts-of-faith/wp/2015/08/07/a-michigan-state-rep-reportedly-tried-to-fake-a-male-prostitution-scandal-to-hide-his-relationship-with-another-republican-state-rep/

Reported on the Post's "Acts of Faith" blog. This should be a made-for-TV movie on Bravo.

[ye-ole-hatch ıll|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llıl]

....

[kosmo vinyl]

Ed Sheeran, who quit school at 16 to concentrate on singing, is to be given an honorary degree for his "outstanding contribution to music".

http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-suffolk-33864684

[Julian, Forum COGNOSCENTI]

Citing airplane bathrooms as being "too small," parents instruct child to defecate in aisle.

[killsaly]

WTF website is that?

https://thenanfang.com/father-takes-baby-to-pee-into-dirty-dishes-at-restaurant/

[Julian, Forum COGNOSCENTI]

WTF website is that?

It appears to be some sort Chinese news source with a section dedicated to bizarre stories. I saw the article on voat.co.