Author Topic: When reality reflects The Onion (redux)  (Read 600417 times)



sweetcell

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Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux)
« Reply #617 on: August 19, 2015, 01:11:24 pm »
Man guarding ?Muslim-free? gun range bends over, drops weapon, accidentally shoots self

A man guarding a ?Muslim-free? gun range in Oktaha, Oklahoma accidentally shot himself while practicing poor gun safety etiquette, KOTV?s Richard Clarke reports.

The man, whose name was not released, belonged to a group that volunteered to stand guard outside of Save Yourself Survival and Tactical Gear after the store?s owner received death threats for installing a sign denying Muslims the right to patronize his establishment.

Muskogee County Sheriff Charles Pearson evinced no surprise about the accidental shooting, saying that he ?saw several of those gentlemen out there yesterday. The way they were holding their weapons, with the fingers on the triggers, you can tell a couple of these gentlemen have no idea about weapons safety. It?s like the Clampetts have come to town.?

(Continued...)

...and the real threat here is...
<sig>

Julian, Forum COGNOSCENTI

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Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux)
« Reply #618 on: August 19, 2015, 01:13:07 pm »
...and the real threat here is...
Do they still do the Darwin Awards? This guy needs submitted.
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DeathFromAbove1979

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Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux)
« Reply #619 on: August 19, 2015, 01:34:15 pm »
Man guarding ?Muslim-free? gun range bends over, drops weapon, accidentally shoots self

A man guarding a ?Muslim-free? gun range in Oktaha, Oklahoma accidentally shot himself while practicing poor gun safety etiquette, KOTV?s Richard Clarke reports.

The man, whose name was not released, belonged to a group that volunteered to stand guard outside of Save Yourself Survival and Tactical Gear after the store?s owner received death threats for installing a sign denying Muslims the right to patronize his establishment.

Muskogee County Sheriff Charles Pearson evinced no surprise about the accidental shooting, saying that he ?saw several of those gentlemen out there yesterday. The way they were holding their weapons, with the fingers on the triggers, you can tell a couple of these gentlemen have no idea about weapons safety. It?s like the Clampetts have come to town.?

(Continued...)

...and the real threat here is...
"Oh, yeah, I saw those guys being stupid with their weapons yesterday. I let them back in today, because, ya know, America. Muslims though. That's the real problem."
‼‼?‼‼

Julian, Forum COGNOSCENTI

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« Last Edit: August 20, 2015, 09:41:38 am by Julian, Verified SHITLORD »
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Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux)
« Reply #621 on: August 20, 2015, 10:24:28 am »
I am totally supporting the McCubbins/Nutz ticket   

I think Nutz is more VP material, but Limberbutt McCubbins...he's the cat's meow
slack

Julian, Forum COGNOSCENTI

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Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux)
« Reply #622 on: August 20, 2015, 10:26:55 am »
I am totally supporting the McCubbins/Nutz ticket   

I think Nutz is more VP material, but Limberbutt McCubbins...he's the cat's meow
I concur, the time is meow for McCubbins, but Nutz is enjoying an Obamaesque rise through the political landscape. Deez Nuts just might get erected.
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Julian, Forum COGNOSCENTI

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Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux)
« Reply #623 on: August 20, 2015, 10:27:30 am »
Deez Nuts just might get erected.
ELECTED. Thanks, autocorrect.
LVMH

Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux)
« Reply #624 on: August 20, 2015, 10:29:02 am »
Deez Nuts just might get erected.
ELECTED. Thanks, autocorrect.
but it was a very Freudian ...so seemed apropos
slack

Justin Tonation

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Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux)
« Reply #625 on: August 20, 2015, 10:35:34 am »
Deez Nuts just might get erected.
ELECTED. Thanks, autocorrect.
but it was a very Freudian ...so seemed apropos

Or he texts "erect" so often that autocorrect assumed....
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Julian, Forum COGNOSCENTI

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Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux)
« Reply #626 on: August 20, 2015, 10:37:03 am »
You're both idiots, I intentionally typed erect and then tried to play it off because it was a weak pun.
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Justin Tonation

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Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux)
« Reply #627 on: August 20, 2015, 10:55:06 am »
You're both idiots, I intentionally typed erect and then tried to play it off because it was a weak pun.

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Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux)
« Reply #628 on: August 20, 2015, 11:00:20 am »
so un-meta
slack

killsaly

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Re: When reality reflects The Onion (redux)
« Reply #629 on: August 20, 2015, 11:28:36 am »