Author Topic: The Groper Thread  (Read 6019 times)

ggw

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Re: The Groper Thread
« Reply #105 on: December 21, 2017, 11:52:45 am »

lily1

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Re: The Groper Thread
« Reply #106 on: December 22, 2017, 12:18:37 am »
That's a fair question and one that I actually got when I was relaying this event to a male colleague.

This individual did not work in my building and had no business in the building. I was able to ascertain that very quickly when I sussed him out with a quick question to confirm this.  In fact he told me he had seen me prior, presumably as he was driving down the street, and this time decided to quickly pull into the lot, park and jump out of his car to follow me when I was on the approach into the building and then hop the elevator with me.

I will add that he told me that he was riding with me to my floor to try to talk to me after the doors closed and I had no way to escape as the other floor was secured for another client and thus I could not exit until it hit my floor to which I hauled ass to my office and it's camera and locked door.

That creeped me out.
 
Does that help give more context?

The reality is that probably at least 3/4 of the world's heterosexual have done something untoward a woman (straight, bi, trans, etc.)

At least 3 times a week, sometimes every workday, I have some asshole(s) beeping at me, hanging out of their vehicle yelling something obscene or flat out driving along the side of me trying to get my attention as I walk the 10 minutes from the metro to the office (I work in the suburbs and commute out from DC.)

The best this year? Some creepy fuck stranger pulled into the parking lot and go out of the car and walked in with me to the building, got on the elevator (open building unfortunately), tried to make small talk regarding Tom Petty's passing, and then decided to attempt to ask me out.  All in the span of about 4 minutes. At 8.24 am on a Tuesday.

Now, my experiences do not compare at all with men or women who were victims of any sort of unwanted/unconsented physical/sexual activity. But it is a good example of every day harassment.  And if these assholes are doing this, who knows what else they are doing.

As someone who is basically quiet and shy, I personally would never have been that bold in my single days, but what exactly is so egregious and "creepy" about the behavior I bolded? It's certainly not sexual harassment. Is it possible the guy worked in the building and just happened to be pulling into his work parking lot and was taking the elevator to his workplace at 8:24am and was making small talk with a pretty woman he saw on the elevator? Are we going to make it a crime to ask someone  you find attractive out?
« Last Edit: December 22, 2017, 07:14:47 am by lily1 »

lily1

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Re: The Groper Thread
« Reply #107 on: December 22, 2017, 12:22:21 am »
It was improper of me to throw out that unsubstantiated 3/4 figure. I'll own that and correct that.

That said, you are correct, "untoward" has many meanings and can vary depending on the setting.  And further to that, one person may consider the action harassment and another does not.

I'd just like to have an entire week where I walk to the office and it's entirely uneventful. That's my request to Santa this year. 

The reality is that probably at least 3/4 of the world's heterosexual have done something untoward a woman (straight, bi, trans, etc.)
Depends how you define "untoward" I guess.

Space Freely

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Re: The Groper Thread
« Reply #108 on: December 22, 2017, 09:38:09 am »
That's a fair question and one that I actually got when I was relaying this event to a male colleague.

This individual did not work in my building and had no business in the building. I was able to ascertain that very quickly when I sussed him out with a quick question to confirm this.  In fact he told me he had seen me prior, presumably as he was driving down the street, and this time decided to quickly pull into the lot, park and jump out of his car to follow me when I was on the approach into the building and then hop the elevator with me.

I will add that he told me that he was riding with me to my floor to try to talk to me after the doors closed and I had no way to escape as the other floor was secured for another client and thus I could not exit until it hit my floor to which I hauled ass to my office and it's camera and locked door.

That creeped me out.
 
Does that help give more context?

The reality is that probably at least 3/4 of the world's heterosexual have done something untoward a woman (straight, bi, trans, etc.)

At least 3 times a week, sometimes every workday, I have some asshole(s) beeping at me, hanging out of their vehicle yelling something obscene or flat out driving along the side of me trying to get my attention as I walk the 10 minutes from the metro to the office (I work in the suburbs and commute out from DC.)

The best this year? Some creepy fuck stranger pulled into the parking lot and go out of the car and walked in with me to the building, got on the elevator (open building unfortunately), tried to make small talk regarding Tom Petty's passing, and then decided to attempt to ask me out.  All in the span of about 4 minutes. At 8.24 am on a Tuesday.

Now, my experiences do not compare at all with men or women who were victims of any sort of unwanted/unconsented physical/sexual activity. But it is a good example of every day harassment.  And if these assholes are doing this, who knows what else they are doing.

As someone who is basically quiet and shy, I personally would never have been that bold in my single days, but what exactly is so egregious and "creepy" about the behavior I bolded? It's certainly not sexual harassment. Is it possible the guy worked in the building and just happened to be pulling into his work parking lot and was taking the elevator to his workplace at 8:24am and was making small talk with a pretty woman he saw on the elevator? Are we going to make it a crime to ask someone  you find attractive out?

Wow, that *is*I creepy. Sorry that happened to you, and glad nothing more did.

Re: The Groper Thread
« Reply #109 on: January 05, 2018, 12:32:51 pm »
LAMF

ggw

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Re: The Groper Thread
« Reply #110 on: January 10, 2018, 10:30:40 am »
Michael Douglas

James Franco

Space Freely

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Re: The Groper Thread
« Reply #111 on: January 11, 2018, 09:42:11 am »
Michael Douglas

James Franco

My wife said, "I think he's gay anyway, but if James Franco hit on me, I'd be fine with it."

walkonbyeeeeeeeee

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Re: The Groper Thread
« Reply #112 on: January 11, 2018, 09:54:00 am »
Does your wife, have to be wearing a black dress, as she allows, and enjoys a man to sexually harass her?


sweetcell

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Re: The Groper Thread
« Reply #114 on: January 11, 2018, 02:48:32 pm »
Michael Douglas

James Franco

My wife said, "I think he's gay anyway, but if James Franco hit on me, I'd be fine with it."

i'm assuming that it takes more than hitting on someone to make the headlines, so the question becomes: would she be ok if franco stuck his hand down her pants, uninvited?  what if he told her that she needed to sleep with him to keep her job?  what if he did some other inappropriate act then threatened her if she ever told anyone?  inquiring minds want to know...
<sig>

Space Freely

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Re: The Groper Thread
« Reply #115 on: January 11, 2018, 03:43:18 pm »
Michael Douglas

James Franco

My wife said, "I think he's gay anyway, but if James Franco hit on me, I'd be fine with it."

i'm assuming that it takes more than hitting on someone to make the headlines, so the question becomes: would she be ok if franco stuck his hand down her pants, uninvited?  what if he told her that she needed to sleep with him to keep her job?  what if he did some other inappropriate act then threatened her if she ever told anyone?  inquiring minds want to know...

I can't answer those questions but she did say she's "with Catherine Deneuve" and that women to some degree need to let "men be men as long as they're not doing any raping and if not James Franco, at least maybe my (sick as a dog for the past week) husband would hit on me."

Which I guess means if I don't get killed at the Cracker show tonight, I guess I should be a little flirty even if I feel like shit.

Sorry if that's TMI. Teleworking and barrel aged stout intermingling this afternoon.
« Last Edit: January 11, 2018, 03:45:34 pm by Space Freely »

excontradiction

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Re: The Groper Thread
« Reply #116 on: January 11, 2018, 05:29:26 pm »
Just be careful of flying bottles, man.

walkonbyeeeeeeeee

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Re: The Groper Thread
« Reply #117 on: January 11, 2018, 10:55:12 pm »
For some reason, every time I think of James, I think of him getting blow jobs. And, it disturbs me.

Space Freely

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Re: The Groper Thread
« Reply #118 on: January 15, 2018, 06:12:28 pm »
Aziz Ansari

walkonbyeeeeeeeee

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Re: The Groper Thread
« Reply #119 on: January 16, 2018, 01:05:29 am »
Aziz Ansari

This one, is going to backfire big time, and kill the movement that is known as me too. It already, has.