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=> GENERAL DISCUSSION => Topic started by: Charlie Nakatestes, Japanese Golfer on February 13, 2004, 11:03:00 am
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At Coyote Ugly, It's Bellies Up On the Bar
But Can It Turn Washington Into an Unbutton-Down Town?
By Joel Achenbach
Washington Post Staff Writer
Friday, February 13, 2004; Page C01
Yeeeeeeeeeeeee-haawwww! Hot babes dancing on the bar! Tight jeans, tank tops, taut bellies, sassy lips . . . slingin' the whiskey, drizzlin' cocktails into gaping mouths. You can see them from the street, silhouetted in the second-floor windows, clogging away till the cows come home. It's a hot-babe bonanza!
They're the Coyotes, the bartenders of Coyote Ugly, Washington's newest, loudest and least undergarment-friendly nightspot.
A news release says the Coyotes will taunt bad tippers, spray the crowd with water "and aim to get the tamest female visitors to dance on the bar and donate their bras."
You're thinking: Unlikely. Not in Washington. The women are too conservative. And yet right here, on a Wednesday night, even as Disney on Ice conducts family-friendly business across the street at MCI Center, that's what's happening: A mysterious babe in black sidles up to the bar and "donates her bra."
Her husband applauds. She slips the bra from underneath her jacket in a deft maneuver, and hands it to the Coyote on top of the bar. The woman in black soon mounts the bar herself and gets in touch with her inner Coyote.
Somewhere along the line, the reporter has forgotten to find out the name of the organization on behalf of which the bras are donated. The Salvation Army?
Now a Coyote is poised over the edge of the bar, pouring "Sex on the Beach" into the mouth of a publisher who is leaning back with her face aimed at the ceiling. She definitely does not want her name in the paper.
"Don't put me in there, I'll get in trouble with my job," says another woman, a lawyer, who has no intention of getting up on the bar. "You got a good job in town, and you come in here and dance on the bar -- you'll look like an idiot."
This has never been a Coyote Ugly sort of city. It's a martini lounge town, a hotel lobby-bar town, a warehouse-size dance club town, but not an in-your-face bartop-babe whiskey-saloon town. This is not a city where you go to work in the morning and say, "Sorry I'm late, got totally trashed last night at the Ugly and danced on the bar."
There's a wildly successful Coyote Ugly at the New York New York casino in Las Vegas, but Vegas is a city that boasts, "What happens here, stays here." The slogan in Washington is more like: "What happens here may be grounds for a special prosecutor."
The federal government is the official schoolmarm of America, constantly holding hearings to fret about a problem, citing folks for regulatory violations, imposing sanctions. The Democrats disapprove of the Republicans and the Republicans disapprove of the Democrats. Everyone disapproves of the Super Bowl halftime show. Disapproval is an industry here. Untoward nocturnal behavior is fodder for scandal, and thousand-page reports with footnotes. The rule here: Cover your butt. Don't shake it on top of the bar.
That's the theory that Coyote Ugly wants to debunk.
"I had no idea what I looked like," a petite data analyst says after she dismounts the bar, "but I had a great time."
What did she think about up there?
"I didn't give a [hoot] about anything," she says.
"Every girl loves being the center of attention," says advertising saleswoman Vicky Pettinaro, who also danced on the bar. Coyote Ugly may trade on women's sexuality, she says, but "there's a difference between sexy and trashy."
The mysterious woman in black reveals herself to be Cassandra Eckert, who runs an online social-event publication. How did she feel onstage?
"Wanted. Desirable."
"Coyote Ugly" was a movie based on the antics at a bar in New York, and the film has spawned several Coyote Uglys (Uglies?) across the country. Jennifer Worthington, owner of the Las Vegas franchise, will have her official grand opening here in Washington tonight, after a couple of shakedown nights for media and VIPs.
Is Washington too conservative for her bar?
"That's precisely why we're going to work in Washington. We came into this market because there's nothing like it. This is a place where girls can go crazy, guys can go crazy. It's like the ultimate fraternity party on steroids," Worthington says.
She insists that even the most conservative-looking women will unleash their inhibitions when given the chance. She notes that her old boss, action-film producer Jerry Bruckheimer, used to call movies the transportation business, saying, "We're taking people out of their world for 21/2 hours." True for movies, true for Coyote Ugly.
Does she dance on the bar?
"No," she says. "I'm the worst dancer in the history of mankind."
With all due respect, isn't this basically a PG-13 strip club?
"It's provocative and it's sexy, without crossing any lines. Absolutely no nudity, no stripper-style dancing," Worthington says.
Which is a cue to get back to the Coyotes. There are 30 of them, and they're all fabulously attractive, selected from a thousand applicants, Worthington says. She wanted strong women, sassy, smart -- "tough, sexy broads." She describes the perfect Coyotes: "The men want to sleep with them, the girls want to be friends with them."
See, it's really a feminist thing, according to the PR pitch. It's not about giving guys something to gawk at, or women a chance to be quasi-strippers for a night. It's about women taking charge. It's practically a matriarchy. One rule is paramount: Only women can dance on the bar.
"It's about making women feel like they're in control," says Cristi Meyer, one of the Vegas Coyotes imported to help the local Coyotes get into gear. "It's all about women. We embarrass guys, we cut off their ties." The Coyotes, she says, "don't take [guff] from anybody."
They are not skimpily dressed, at least not exactly. They wear long pants, for gosh sakes! That said, the jeans are so tight, they're epidermal. There is no flashing of thong straps, but that carries with it another tantalizing implication. This one lass, she's got a horizontal tear in her jeans right at the rump line, and one begins to ponder the possibility that some of these young ladies aren't -- how to say this politely? -- wearing much in the way of drawers.
(Face it: Just reading this story is a form of misbehavior. There will be repercussions.)
If one could make a complaint, it's not that the Coyotes haven't worked out all the kinks in their dance routines, it's that they all have pretty much the same body. Another oddity: Coyote Ugly has no lower gears. No downshifting allowed. It's always in overdrive. The dials on the sound system go up to 11. Tired of loud music and dancing Coyotes on the first floor? Go up to the second floor and there's more of them, and more on the third: Three full floors of go-go-Coyote. You will have fun, you must have fun, and if you don't have fun you'll feel guilty for not having fun.
And then there will be congressional hearings on why you didn't have fun.
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Yipee this means that DC will finally get a Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. Resturant and Market that we have always deserved but where never quite hip enough to merit. And think of all those tourist who wont be able to decide between the Coyote Bar, Hard Rock Cafe and Hooters.
Why can't they just clone a couple of Bob and Ediths for the rest of us mopey indie types...
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"It's like the ultimate fraternity party on steroids"
and this is a GOOD thing? sounds like the recipe for date rape to me
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Originally posted by Celeste:
"It's like the ultimate fraternity party on steroids"
and this is a GOOD thing? sounds like the recipe for date rape to me
No no...it's a GREAT thing, at least we know were all the obnoxious fart boys will be with their beige pants, boat shoes and secret farternity handshakes will be...the rest of the city will be ours, all ours!!!!
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Hmmm, a feminist thing. Wonder when the "Bar Dancing and Empowerment" course will show up in the Vassar catalog?
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so when are we going then...........
next boardie party should be soon right?
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damnit lulu, you stole my line.
Originally posted by poorlulu:
so when are we going then...........
next boardie party should be soon right?
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Originally posted by Rutherford J. Balls:
damnit lulu, you stole my line.
Originally posted by poorlulu:
so when are we going then...........
next boardie party should be soon right?
[/b]
great minds think alike...................?
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I like to objectivise women, I can think of no place better.....
let's go.
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I would think the Mankster would be all for a place where the women dance on the bars.
Sounds like he's just bitter that the aforementioned women have the bad taste to go for the frat boys, and not him... :p
Originally posted by mankie:
Originally posted by Celeste:
"It's like the ultimate fraternity party on steroids"
and this is a GOOD thing? sounds like the recipe for date rape to me
No no...it's a GREAT thing, at least we know were all the obnoxious fart boys will be with their beige pants, boat shoes and secret farternity handshakes will be...the rest of the city will be ours, all ours!!!! [/b]
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we can't let samantha come with us though........
if they make her take off her bra, then she dances on the bar.........lives could be lost............ ;)
at the very least she'll give herself black eyes.......... :eek:
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I like to objectivise British people. Can we go to Mousetrap sometime soon?
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when is mousetrap?
i'm in for that............
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Originally posted by thirsty moore:
I like to objectivise British people. Can we go to Mousetrap sometime soon?
Isnt that the last place you would find a British person?
Next you will tell me we should all start looking for life-partners at coyote ugly?
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Originally posted by poorlulu:
great minds think alike...................?
be afraid... ;) this is the beginning of the end for you
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Originally posted by poorlulu:
when is mousetrap?
i'm in for that............
We are going to South and Metric.
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i made a vow long ago to never go anywhere where they had women dancing on the bar. nice to know somewhere in dc is now disqualified as well.
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Originally posted by god's shoeshine:
i made a vow
aren't vows made to be broken?
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I hate to admit that I have been to a bar like this, but in NYC, was not coyote ugly but just like it. Was not my choice, and I was there with a bunch of Morgan Stanley trainees (one of them being a high school friend and reason I was there), it was fucking awful. All you can do is drink as much as possible to try and get through it. Ben Stiller and his then fiancee were there, he is 2 feet tall.
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Originally posted by god's shoeshine:
i made a vow long ago to never go anywhere where they had women dancing on the bar. nice to know somewhere in dc is now disqualified as well.
dancing on the bar is fine if it's sponatenous... i.e. at a fleshtones show. but when its expected and coeirced, it's like going to guns n' roses show.
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so what other crap francised themed venues are we missing out in dc?
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I think there's a bar at the top of the Washington Monument.
Originally posted by kosmo vinyl:
so what other crap francised themed venues are we missing out in dc?
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Originally posted by Rutherford J. Balls:
[QB] I would think the Mankster would be all for a place where the women dance on the bars.
Sounds like he's just bitter that the aforementioned women have the bad taste to go for the frat boys, and not him... :p
You really have no clue about me do you...I mean seriously.
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Vassar aint the real world, babe.
Gotta go to LA for those classes...or perhaps, god forbid, England...
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,8127-941850,00.html (http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,8127-941850,00.html)
Exercise striptease classes began in Los Angeles three years ago. Then, they were looked on as the latest crank offering that was unlikely to catch on. Today, fitness classes which incorporate striptease movements have become so much a part of the mainstream workout scene in LA that it is rumoured that the local stripper clubs are sending their talent scouts out to the gyms.
And the phenomenon is no longer being contained within LA any more either. This month Carmen Electra, the pneumatic brunette of Baywatch fame, has launched her own aerobic striptease workout video in the United States that is destined for Britain in the spring. A new book, The S Factor: Strip Workouts for Every Woman, by Sheila Kelley, an actress and former star of the television series LA Law, is also due for release in bookshops the world over in the next few months. Aerobic striptease classes are going down faster than a stripperā??s knickers in gyms everywhere.
Originally posted by Bags:
Hmmm, a feminist thing. Wonder when the "Bar Dancing and Empowerment" course will show up in the Vassar catalog?
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I guess not.
Originally posted by mankie:
Originally posted by Rutherford J. Balls:
[QB] I would think the Mankster would be all for a place where the women dance on the bars.
Sounds like he's just bitter that the aforementioned women have the bad taste to go for the frat boys, and not him... :p
You really have no clue about me do you...I mean seriously. [/b]
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Originally posted by kosmo vinyl:
Originally posted by god's shoeshine:
i made a vow long ago to never go anywhere where they had women dancing on the bar. nice to know somewhere in dc is now disqualified as well.
dancing on the bar is fine if it's sponatenous... i.e. at a fleshtones show. but when its expected and coeirced, it's like going to guns n' roses show. [/b]
alot of the silly corporate dance clubs in pittsburgh had women dancing on the bar all the time. unfortunatly, those were the only places that had better than a 3:1 guy to girl ratio. and they liked to play guns n roses...alot. bon jovi too.
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I made the grave mstake of going to Joes Crabshack one time for a bite to eat.....at one point all the wait staff jumped up on the tables and started dancing.....on tables I was expected to eat food off.
Needless to say I got up and left.
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Originally posted by thirsty moore:
[qb] I think there's a bar at the top of the Washington Monument.
I took a dump at the Washington mounment.
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Originally posted by kosmo vinyl:
Why can't they just clone a couple of Bob and Ediths for the rest of us mopey indie types...
mmm...i love Bob and Ediths
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Was it as good as the one you have in store for Mankie's showroom?
Originally posted by Dupek Chopra:
Originally posted by thirsty moore:
[qb] I think there's a bar at the top of the Washington Monument.
I took a dump at the Washington mounment. [/b]
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Originally posted by Rutherford J. Balls:
Was it as good as the one you have in store for Mankie's showroom?
Originally posted by Dupek Chopra:
Originally posted by thirsty moore:
[qb] I think there's a bar at the top of the Washington Monument.
I took a dump at the Washington mounment. [/b]
[/b]
I always thought Dupek was "scat'erbrained" but this isn't what I had in mind.
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I took a dump at the White House, too.
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sounds like the world is your dumping ground
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Originally posted by Celeste:
sounds like the world is your dumping ground
i had a roomate in college who peed on Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris...she said she thought it was just some church...
she was an idiot
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Originally posted by MaLo:
Originally posted by Celeste:
sounds like the world is your dumping ground
i had a roomate in college who peed on Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris...she said she thought it was just some church...
[/b]
Good for her. It was French, what other reason is needed?
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Originally posted by MaLo:
Originally posted by Celeste:
sounds like the world is your dumping ground
i had a roomate in college who peed on Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris...she said she thought it was just some church...
she was an idiot [/b]
Whew, the coolest thing is how a chick pees on a building!
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mmm chick pees
<img src="http://www.e-rcps.com/pasta/rcp/p_abc/i/chickpeas.gif" alt=" - " />
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Originally posted by Celeste:
mmm chick pees
<img src="http://www.e-rcps.com/pasta/rcp/p_abc/i/chickpeas.gif" alt=" - " />
I love em, just had a load in my salad!..yum yum.
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Originally posted by mankie:
Originally posted by MaLo:
Originally posted by Celeste:
sounds like the world is your dumping ground
i had a roomate in college who peed on Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris...she said she thought it was just some church...
[/b]
Good for her. It was French, what other reason is needed? [/b]
peeing on churches makes baby jesus cry
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About 6 years ago after that stupid movie came out I had to drive to Pennsylvania by Philly. Went the back way through Delaware on the little roads. Well there was this concrete foundation with no restaurant (evidently sat there for years) with a sign saying a Coyote Ugly was coming there. Never materialized since the movie sucked so bad (though I never saw it). I guess with people forgetting the movie existed they are trying again to make the chain.
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Originally posted by god's shoeshine:
peeing on churches makes baby jesus cry [/b]
But you know he'd have a little chuckle to himself if you pee'd on a synagogue.
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i wouldn't want to offend krusty the clown. that would be worse
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Have you been blowing one of the guys at work again?
Originally posted by mankie:
[
[/qb][/QUOTE]I love em, just had a load in my salad!..yum yum. [/QB][/QUOTE]
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Originally posted by Rutherford J. Balls:
Have you been blowing one of the guys at work again?
Originally posted by mankie:
[
I love em, just had a load in my salad!..yum yum. [/QB][/QUOTE] [/QB][/QUOTE]
Why does it not surprise me that you could turn that into a reference to sucking dick?
Freudian?
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Just playing follow the leader. You never seem to be able to resist turning things I say into a digs at my sexuality.
Originally posted by mankie:
Originally posted by Rutherford J. Balls:
Have you been blowing one of the guys at work again?
Originally posted by mankie:
[
I love em, just had a load in my salad!..yum yum. [/b]
[/QB][/QUOTE]
Why does it not surprise me that you could turn that into a reference to sucking dick?
Freudian? [/QB][/QUOTE]
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Originally posted by Rutherford J. Balls:
[QB] Just playing follow the leader.
Sheep!
And no! I don't shag them.
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Originally posted by mankie:
Originally posted by Rutherford J. Balls:
[QB] Just playing follow the leader.
Sheep!
And no! I don't shag them. [/b]
You're not from Wales are you...
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