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=> GENERAL DISCUSSION => Topic started by: Frank Gallagher on April 08, 2005, 06:22:00 am

Title: Next Pope!
Post by: Frank Gallagher on April 08, 2005, 06:22:00 am
BONO!!!
 
 
 And he'll be known as "Pope Ringo George I" just to keep the trend going.
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: Yank on April 08, 2005, 12:34:00 pm
Q: Why wasn't Jesus born in Manchester?
 
 A: They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin!
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: sonickteam on April 08, 2005, 12:38:00 pm
Q: What's the difference between Alex Ferguson and God?
 
 A: God doesn't think he's Alex Ferguson.
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: Frank Gallagher on April 09, 2005, 06:09:00 am
Police in Merseyside on the lookout of new Al Queada cell operating.
 
 They have found four of the members
 
 Bin Sleapin
 Bin Fytin
 Bin Drincken
 Bin Stealen
 
 Unfortunately they've been unable to find the fouth member
 
 Bin Werkin
 
 Hey, if you can dig up the oldies, so can I
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: joeavrage on April 09, 2005, 05:39:00 pm
Quote
Originally posted by O'Mankie:
  BONO!!!
 
 
 And he'll be known as "Pope Ringo George I" just to keep the trend going.
Funny you should say that...here's an exchange I had with PaddyPower.com, a betting agency in Ireland, last Monday:
 
 From: MyCat CanDJ [mailto:mycatcandj@gmail.com]
 > Sent: Monday, April 04, 2005 12:50 PM
 > To: support@paddypower.net
 > Subject: Request
 >
 > Dear Administrator:
 >
 >Please add Paul "Bono" Hewson to this list.
 
 web page (http://www.paddypower.com/bet?action=show_type_by_main_market&category=SPECIALS&ev_class_id=45&id=520)
 >
 > I have a very strong feeling about this one, and I am very rarely wrong.
 >
 > Best
 
 
 >> Response (Micheal)   04/04/2005 06:48 PM
 >>Hi,
 
 >>Thank you for your mail,
 
 >>We will not be adding Bono to the list for next Pope im afraid,
 >>although if you wish to back him we will offer you a price of 500-1,
 >>you can call dial a bet at 1800 721 821 (irl) or 08000 565 265 (uk)."
 
 What's weird is, at the time, they were giving odds of 1000-1 for a 'Father Dougal Maguire of Craggy Island' so apparently they weren't prepared to totally rule Bono out...
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: on April 09, 2005, 05:51:00 pm
My money's on Jaime Lucas Ortega y Alamino (Cuba) in the 4th by a T.K.O.
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: Yank on April 10, 2005, 01:45:00 am
Mine wasn't a joke though.  I'm sure it's somewhere in the Bible....Book Of Revelations?  
 
 Now this is a joke.  What's funnier than Liverpool losing to Manchester City on Saturday?
 
 Manchester United losing to Norwich City!  Now that is funny.
 
 
Quote
Originally posted by O'Mankie:
  Police in Merseyside on the lookout of new Al Queada cell operating.
 
 They have found four of the members
 
 Bin Sleapin
 Bin Fytin
 Bin Drincken
 Bin Stealen
 
 Unfortunately they've been unable to find the fouth member
 
 Bin Werkin
 
 Hey, if you can dig up the oldies, so can I
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: Yank on April 10, 2005, 07:31:00 am
Okay Mankie, I've done the research, and here's the result. This is no joke!  Go to The Book Of Revelations, Chapter 12, Verse 6......
 
 
 And God told Joseph, stay clear of the city of miserable bastards and unfit birds, for there are no men of wisdom nor women of crossed legs.
 
 You can not argue with the Bible mate!
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: on April 10, 2005, 09:38:00 am
<img src="http://img131.exs.cx/img131/9323/popeidol4lw.jpg" alt=" - " />
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: Justin Tonation on April 10, 2005, 11:11:00 am
I like this one better.
 
  <img src="http://www.creators.com/0403/LK/LK0408g.gif" alt=" - " />
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: Frank Gallagher on April 11, 2005, 04:22:00 pm
Quote
Originally posted by Mr Dodgy Slapper:
  Okay Mankie, I've done the research, and here's the result. This is no joke!  Go to The Book Of Revelations, Chapter 12, Verse 6......
 
 
 And God told Joseph, stay clear of the city of thieving bastards and unclean birds, for there are no men of honesty nor women of beauty.
 
 You can not argue with the Bible mate!
I'm sure he was talking about Liverpool, even the Pope got the hell out of the shithole rapidly when he visited.
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: on April 11, 2005, 05:59:00 pm
I predict that a fresher, MTV-age Pope will be chosen.  Why???  Well, they've already pimped the Popemobile.
 
    <img src="http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y25/team_dupek/nascarpope.jpg" alt=" - " />
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: SalParadise on April 11, 2005, 07:33:00 pm
<img src="http://www.adammessinger.com/images/bono-for-pope/pope_bono.jpg" alt=" - " />
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: on April 13, 2005, 03:48:00 pm
<img src="http://www.bobfromaccounting.com/3_3005/popedanza2.jpg" alt=" - " />
 Tony Danza (http://www.bobfromaccounting.com/) for Pope
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: Yank on April 14, 2005, 02:47:00 am
Quote
Originally posted by O'Mankie:
   
Quote
Originally posted by Mr Dodgy Slapper:
  Okay Mankie, I've done the research, and here's the result. This is no joke!  Go to The Book Of Revelations, Chapter 12, Verse 6......
 
 
 And God told Joseph, stay clear of the city of thieving bastards and unclean birds, for there are no men of honesty nor women of beauty.
 
 You can not argue with the Bible mate!
I'm sure he was talking about Liverpool, even the Pope got the hell out of the shithole rapidly when he visited. [/b]
How long did the Pope stay in Sodom, errrr, I mean Manchester?
 
 How about those Reds making it to the quarterfinals against Chelsey?  Not bad for a bunch of underachievers.  Maybe when that great Mancunian, Malcolm Glazer, takes control of United, you'll do better in the Champions League!?  Nah, I doubt it.    :D
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: Frank Gallagher on April 14, 2005, 08:10:00 am
Quote
Originally posted by Mr Dodgy Slapper:
   
Quote
Originally posted by O'Mankie:
   
Quote
Originally posted by Mr Dodgy Slapper:
  Okay Mankie, I've done the research, and here's the result. This is no joke!  Go to The Book Of Revelations, Chapter 12, Verse 6......
 
 
 And God told Joseph, stay clear of the city of thieving bastards and unclean birds, for there are no men of honesty nor women of beauty.
 
 You can not argue with the Bible mate!
I'm sure he was talking about Liverpool, even the Pope got the hell out of the shithole rapidly when he visited. [/b]
How long did the Pope stay in Sodom, errrr, I mean Manchester?
 
 How about those Reds making it to the quarterfinals against Chelsey?  Not bad for a bunch of underachievers.  Maybe when that great Mancunian, Malcolm Glazer, takes control of United, you'll do better in the Champions League!?  Nah, I doubt it.     :D  [/b]
Are the final numbers in yet for how many Italians your scumbags murdered last night? I think they were trying to beat the record of 39 set 20 years ago.
 
 
 The good news is, there's going to be an English team in the final....the bad news is it's either chelski or scum. I'm hoping scum to be honest because they have no hope of beating AC Milan, who should stroll into the final now....not much hope of beating chelski either unless they keep Gerrard off the park, he's already scored his first goal for his new team in the 'nobody gives a toss' cup final so no point in giving him his second.
 
 If Glazer gets United I will probably lose all interest in the sport......hurling looks interesting.
 
 
 All joking aside though, if United don't get their shit together...it's going to be like lambs to the slaughter against Newcastle on Sunday.
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: flawd101 on April 15, 2005, 09:58:00 am
i should be pope....
 
 if i become a priest now...by the next "pope picking"  i might be eligible!!!  think about that
 pope flawd: leader of all the catholics.  i bet the pope could get a lot of ass! :)
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: Frank Gallagher on April 15, 2005, 10:20:00 am
Quote
Originally posted by flawd101:
  i should be pope....
 
 if i become a priest now...by the next "pope picking"  i might be eligible!!!  think about that
 pope flawd: leader of all the catholics.  i bet the pope could get a lot of ass!  :)  
Unfortunately for young boys such as yourself.....it's your ass they're getting.
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: flawd101 on April 15, 2005, 10:24:00 am
no, im 16...thats why catholics have confirmation.
 
 they bullshit and say its your initiation but....it is the age limit in which priests can't touch them anymore...
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: Jaguär on April 16, 2005, 09:54:00 pm
Quote
Originally posted by O'Mankie:
     
Quote
Originally posted by flawd101:
  i should be pope....
 
 if i become a priest now...by the next "pope picking"  i might be eligible!!!  think about that
 pope flawd: leader of all the catholics.  i bet the pope could get a lot of ass!      :)      
Unfortunately for young boys such as yourself.....it's your ass they're getting. [/b]
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
 
 What a set-up!!!
 
 Good one there, O'Mankie.      ;)    
 
 You know, Flawd might be onto something. According to, whatever, the next Pope or the one after that is supposed to be some insider Satanist planted into position to bring down the Catholic church. As if they aren't doing a good enough job of it already!
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: flawd101 on April 17, 2005, 11:32:00 am
i almost got over it...now i have to go back to my shrink...i cant believe what those bastards did to me  :(    :D  
 
 i was thinking a steel cage match.  three cardnals enter, and one pope emerges!
 
 they can fuck mike tyson and have it the same day as his fight!   with all the catholics and people in the world...the church would make a fuck load of more money.  and still collect that sunday at mass!!!
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: brennser on April 19, 2005, 12:48:00 pm
Habemus Papam!
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: ratioci nation on April 19, 2005, 12:53:00 pm
Quote
Originally posted by brennser:
  Habemus Papam!
mmmmmmmmm, Pappadums!
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: kosmo vinyl on April 19, 2005, 12:55:00 pm
i get all my news first via the forum   :D
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: eros on April 19, 2005, 12:58:00 pm
Congratulations
 
  <img src="http://www.nndb.com/people/788/000024716/ratz1-sized.jpg" alt=" - " />
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: bearman🐻 on April 19, 2005, 01:17:00 pm
HA! Exactly what I thought. Pope Cliff the 1st.
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: Frank Gallagher on April 19, 2005, 02:59:00 pm
To all you left-footers....I give you!
 
 BENEDICT XIV!!!!!
 
  <img src="http://hist.academic.claremontmckenna.edu/jpetropoulos/hitlerimages/image002.jpg" alt=" - " />
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: jkeisenh on April 19, 2005, 03:27:00 pm
at least he's old, so he'll die soon... right??
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: markie on April 19, 2005, 03:34:00 pm
Why is he Benedict XIV? Not Ratzenger I?
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: HoyaSaxa03 on April 19, 2005, 03:52:00 pm
it's good to see that ex-nazis have a place in the church
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: jkeisenh on April 19, 2005, 03:56:00 pm
yes.  it's an organization with a great future, you know, that welcomes nazis but shuns gay people and makes sure women have at best a fringe role in its business...
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: Venerable Bede on April 19, 2005, 04:19:00 pm
Quote
Originally posted by Miss MaRpIe:
  Why is he Benedict XIV? Not Ratzenger I?
i was hoping for a more old skool name, like celestine or boniface or callixtus or sixtus.  he could of been sixtus vi.
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: helicon1 on April 19, 2005, 04:33:00 pm
Quote
Originally posted by HoyaSaxa03:
  it's good to see that ex-nazis have a place in the church
It was compulsory to join at that time. Read the article at the Times (http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,2089-1572667,00.html)
 for more information. I wouldn't consider him a Nazi.
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: HoyaSaxa03 on April 19, 2005, 04:57:00 pm
Quote
Originally posted by Glass Arm Shattering:
   
Quote
Originally posted by HoyaSaxa03:
  it's good to see that ex-nazis have a place in the church
It was compulsory to join at that time. Read the article at the Times (http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,2089-1572667,00.html)
 for more information. I wouldn't consider him a Nazi. [/b]
i know, i was being sarcastic ... still though, there were germans who looked past their herd mentality and dissented ... i guess i just hoped that the moral voice of more than a billion people could have been one of them
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: HoyaSaxa03 on April 19, 2005, 05:05:00 pm
??Resistance was truly impossible,? Georg Ratzinger said. ??Before we were conscripted, one of our teachers said we should fight and become heroic Nazis and another told us not to worry as only one soldier in a thousand was killed. But neither of us ever used a rifle against the enemy.?
 
 Some locals in Traunstein, like Elizabeth Lohner, 84, whose brother-in-law was sent to Dachau as a conscientious objector, dismiss such suggestions. ??It was possible to resist, and those people set an example for others,? she said. ??The Ratzingers were young and had made a different choice.?
 
 ------------------------------
 
 that's kinda what i was referring to, but in all honesty i don't think it's a huge deal, the guy was a product of his times, much like people who grew up in the jim crow south ... i would just have more respect for him if he dissented rather than went with the flow
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: Liberte on April 19, 2005, 05:41:00 pm
Quote
Originally posted by HoyaSaxa03:
  ....i would just have more respect for him if he dissented rather than went with the flow
I would have settled for his having learned something about the downside of rigid ideological purity from the experience.
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: Bags on April 19, 2005, 06:14:00 pm
Quote
Originally posted by Liberte:
   
Quote
Originally posted by HoyaSaxa03:
  ....i would just have more respect for him if he dissented rather than went with the flow
I would have settled for his having learned something about the downside of rigid ideological purity from the experience. [/b]
EXCELLENT point.  I'm disappointed, but really, would they ever nominate a Pope that made me happy?  I don't think so...Archbishop Thomas McCarick wasn't in the running.
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: Herr Professor Doktor Doom on April 19, 2005, 08:58:00 pm
Quote
Originally posted by Liberte:
   
Quote
Originally posted by HoyaSaxa03:
  ....i would just have more respect for him if he dissented rather than went with the flow
I would have settled for his having learned something about the downside of rigid ideological purity from the experience. [/b]
beautifully said...
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: hitman on April 20, 2005, 01:26:00 am
at his coronation, they all high stepped, put hands up in the air, and yelled "Zig Heil! (sp?)"
 
 this is all such bullshit...no matter what...
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: nkotb on April 20, 2005, 09:00:00 am
I'm not sure of the answer, but I can tell you a drunken, 80-year-old biker at my local bar didn't like the name.  Seems Ratzinger should've chosen something more patriotic, since it was too close to Benedict Arnold for his liking.  I heart America.
 
   
Quote
Originally posted by Miss MaRpIe:
  Why is he Benedict XIV? Not Ratzenger I?
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: nkotb on April 20, 2005, 10:34:00 am
Seperated at birth?
 
  <img src="http://i.a.cnn.net/cnn/2005/LAW/03/16/blake.case/story.blake.reax.pool.jpg" alt=" - " />  
 
  <img src="http://i.a.cnn.net/cnn/2005/WORLD/europe/04/20/pope.wednesday/story.greetings.jpg" alt=" - " />
 
  <img src="http://www.blueharvest.net/images/prequel/pr/young-palpatine.jpg" alt=" - " />
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: on April 20, 2005, 01:25:00 pm
Robert Blake has announced that he's currently rather destitute.  He's so poor, in fact, that, yesterday, he had to go back into Denny's to retrieve his pistol.
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: HoyaSaxa03 on April 20, 2005, 01:28:00 pm
Quote
Originally posted by Dupek Chopra:
  Robert Blake has announced that he's currently rather poor.  He's so poor, in fact, that, yesterday, he had to go back into Denny's to retrieve his pistol.
**rimshot**, awkwardly fake paul schaeffer laugh
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: on April 20, 2005, 01:30:00 pm
Yeah, I stole that from Leno, actually.
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: joeavrage on April 20, 2005, 06:09:00 pm
Now they're taking odds for the *next* pope, i.e. the one after Benedict
 
 http://www.paddypower.com/bet?action=show_type_by_main_market&category=SPECIALS&ev_class_id=45&id=520 (http://www.paddypower.com/bet?action=show_type_by_main_market&category=SPECIALS&ev_class_id=45&id=520)
 
 And check who's listed at 1000-1 !!!!!
 
 
Quote
Originally posted by My Cat Can DJ:
   
Quote
Originally posted by O'Mankie:
  BONO!!!
 
 
 And he'll be known as "Pope Ringo George I" just to keep the trend going.
Funny you should say that...here's an exchange I had with PaddyPower.com, a betting agency in Ireland, last Monday:
 
 From: MyCat CanDJ [mailto:mycatcandj@gmail.com]
 > Sent: Monday, April 04, 2005 12:50 PM
 > To: support@paddypower.net
 > Subject: Request
 >
 > Dear Administrator:
 >
 >Please add Paul "Bono" Hewson to this list.
 
 web page (http://www.paddypower.com/bet?action=show_type_by_main_market&category=SPECIALS&ev_class_id=45&id=520)
 >
 > I have a very strong feeling about this one, and I am very rarely wrong.
 >
 > Best
 
 
 >> Response (Micheal)   04/04/2005 06:48 PM
 >>Hi,
 
 >>Thank you for your mail,
 
 >>We will not be adding Bono to the list for next Pope im afraid,
 >>although if you wish to back him we will offer you a price of 500-1,
 >>you can call dial a bet at 1800 721 821 (irl) or 08000 565 265 (uk)."
 
 What's weird is, at the time, they were giving odds of 1000-1 for a 'Father Dougal Maguire of Craggy Island' so apparently they weren't prepared to totally rule Bono out... [/b]
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: on April 21, 2005, 05:41:00 pm
<img src="http://www.freakingnews.com/entries/10000/10442INPM_w.jpg" alt=" - " />
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: on April 25, 2005, 06:37:00 pm
www.popetoast.com (http://www.popetoast.com)
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: on April 25, 2005, 06:52:00 pm
<img src="http://www.danamongden.net/archives/images/popelackfaith.jpg" alt=" - " />
  I find your lack of faith disturbing.
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: flawd101 on April 26, 2005, 04:20:00 pm
pope palpatine!!!
 
 popaltine (like ovaltine!!!)
Title: Re: Next Pope!
Post by: on April 26, 2005, 04:59:00 pm
<img src="http://www.freakingnews.com/entries/10500/10542NSUR_w.jpg" alt=" - " />