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=> GENERAL DISCUSSION => Topic started by: ratioci nation on May 28, 2004, 11:06:00 am
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I found this somewhat amusing, from Seachange's website...
http://www.seachangemusic.com/ (http://www.seachangemusic.com/)
Following our three weeks in the eye of the capitalist storm, the United States Of America, we thought we??d bring you a (mostly) brand inspired report on an English band??s experience of America;
Seachange endorse the following stuff:
Whiskey Sours
The Onion
Naked Juice
Brooklyn Diner Bloody Marys
Guided By Voices ?? as American as apple pie.
Burning River Beer (from Cleveland)
Brooklyn Lager
Yuenling Beer (its hard enough to ask for one at the bar let alone try to spell it)
American secondhand record shops (like the one in Trenton)
The coffee in Seattle
Hilarious TV adverts for drugs (that??s the stuff you buy at the chemists if you??re reading this in England) where by law the advertiser has to list all possible side effects, cue great adverts for Viagra where voiceover man has to state ??may result in prolonged erection for up to 4 hours?. Haha.
KEXP ?? the fantastic radio station from Seattle
The Philadelphia Independent ?? spoof broadsheet newspaper where the tag lines read like GBV song titles ie ??Old dried out corn husks may become feast for the eyes?. Great.
The New Romance by PGMG?? what a song. And its their new single so buy it.
Fender guitars ?? can we have some free ones please??
The El Train in Chicago ?? especially the old wooden platforms.
American tourbuses (how can we go back to our rusty old ambulance after crusing through LA in our gleaming white and chrome pimp machine?)
La Quinta motels
The Valley Kids from Bakersfield and Fresno. On weird drugs, into their music and some of the friendliest (and best dressed) people we met in America. Right On.
Animal Planet TV Channel preferably at an ungodly hour of the morning. Where science and entertainment become one. The best programme was undoubtably the one on ??Weird Animals??. To quote; ??Birds can fly ?? that??s so weird?, ??Elephants have trunks ?? weird?. We??re not making this up.
The Phoenix Hotel in San Francisco and San Francisco generally
The courtesy and welcome that we experienced pretty much everywhere
Free refills in restaurants
The macho burger (3/4) and the goliath burger (1lb) at Johns Burgers in Bakersfield. Note, the party member who ate the Goliath burger actually increased in size quite worryingly for a few hours.
The Caulfield Sisters ?? like Kristin Hersch backed by Galaxie 500. Awesome.
Parliament cigarettes ?? cheap and an anti lip-cancer filter. So you can be health conscious and smoke. These Americans are clever.
CMT ?? the country music channel, eye and ear candy for when you really need to switch off.
Seachange do not endorse this stuff:
Corn syrup (the secret ingredient of everything disgusting, note America, Potato salad does not need corn syrup)
The news (especially Fox) and TV in general
Dunkin Donuts (after a brief fling at the beginning of the tour, this relationship soon went sour)
Regis and Kelly ?? a half-dead man and a bimbo with a stapled smile who seem to be on TV everytime you turn it on. Think Des and Mel but even worse.
Subway ?? you know you??re in a bad way when you start thinking of Subway as a healthy lunchtime snack. Never in the history of food have so many ingredients tasted of so little.
Bud Lite - oh, that Bud??s for me?? No thanks
Getting stuck in the ??thank you? ??you??re welcome? ??thank you? ??you??re welcome? loop at service stations the morning after the night before.
Orio cookie ice cream things (however special mention should be made for Mark Spivey??s unstinting support of this product range including the turd bar, looks like something out a drain but with ice-cream inside, honestly you just don??t get this kind of stuff in Europe).
The prick we sat next to in Denny??s who made a very public refusal to eat Heinz Ketchup as it meant he was tacitly supporting the Democratic presidential campaign. Oh for the guts to actually get up and say something?
Hardees Burgers ?? I??m feeling ill even at the mere flicker of a thought of one - and you thought English service stations were bad.
Too much maple syrup at Breakfast ?? always seems like a good idea at the time??.
And while we??re on the subject bad motel breakfasts generally, particularly the whatever-inn in Castaic in CA. Shitty coffee and shitty cake do not a good breakfast make.
Hotel/Motel night reception staff ?? OK so you shouldn??t really have go at John Doe just doing his job, but the problem is these people can??t do their job. I suppose just staying awake is hard enough?..
Gary Youngs Hospital album ?? I wish this could be in the other column, but its really not very good with the possible exception of track 2 but even then its more laughing at than with. God, that sounds unduly harsh. Maybe it just needs a few more listens. We bumped into Gary Young in Seattle thus completing a Pavement hat-trick (see previous month??s entry).
Carb-free burgers ?? complete nonsense, if its not in a roll its not a burger. Duurrrr
Toby Keith ?? yes the guy who wrote that godawful song about uncle sam kicking your ass a couple of years ago is back with his new song ??Whisky Girl??. The video features a woman in her underwear fixing the engine of a truck. In his dreams?.
Sanity on those long drives was maintained by:
Althea & Donna - Uptown Top Ranking
Smiley Culture - Police Officer
Jello Biafra & DOA - Full Metal Jackoff
Bobby Womack - Across 110th Street
Sparks - Number One Song In Heaven
Nirvana - Aneurysm
The Caulfield Sisters- Phoebe's Songs
Bruce Springsteen - The Rising
Magnetic Fields - 69 Love Songs
Beat Happening - Jamboree
TV On The Radio - Desperate youth, blood thirsty babes
Blue Nile - Hats / Peace at Last
Chic - At Last I Am Free
Robert Wyatt - At Last I Am Free
Daft Punk - Alive 1997
Ween - Quebec
DJ Dangermouse - The Grey Album
The Walkmen - Bows And Arrows
...and sanity destroyed by:
David Lee Roth- Crazy for The Heat (the Song)
Ritual Tension - Hotel California
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i wish more visiting bands did this...cool list. i like hearing this perspective about stuff here.
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Originally posted by pollard:
American secondhand record shops (like the one in Trenton)
In Trenton?!? I'm gonna be there for a long weekend (family stuff) -- oh, to think there may be some respite to be found.
Love the whole thing, pollard. Really interesting and funny stuff.
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If a doodle band did the same while touring Britain I imagine the list would look something like this.......
..(band name).... endorses the following stuff,
Women with cute accents
Funny little cars
Beer that I got drunk on just after two sips
Juke boxes that are packed with awesome music
Laughing at other guys calling me 'mate'
Fans at concerts that really let go and have a good time.
Riding on the top of a double decker bus.
Even seven year olds have cellphones.
Eating fast food out of newspaper.
That brown sauce in a bottle.
People buying us beer when they find out we're not from round here.
Lady that owns the B&B asking what time we'd like her to knock us up.
Tea that tastes like something, and not dishwater.
When watching the news you actually get the news, and not some right-wing propaganda like back in the states.
...(band name)...doesn't endorse
Women with cute accents but bad teeth
Cars with steering wheels on the wrong side
Beer that makes me drunk after two sips
Juke boxes that cost a fortune to play a song.
Getting punched in the face when I laugh at a guy who calls me 'mate'.
Fans at concerts that throw shit at us because we suck.
Riding on top of a double decker bus in the rain.
Seven year olds text messaging each other.
Why can't I get Mickey D's in newspaper too?
What is that brown stuff, we don't have that in America so it can't be good.
People always buying us beer so we get drunk and puke.
Finding out the B&B owners husband is the one who knocks us up.
When asking what kind of coffees they have I'm told, "black or white"
Newscasters with the personality of a worm.
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Originally posted by pollard:
The Valley Kids from Bakersfield and Fresno. On weird drugs, into their music and some of the friendliest (and best dressed) people we met in America. Right On.
It's the Seattle of the new millenium.
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I'd bet dollars to donuts that they mean The Princeton Record Exchange (http://www.prex.com). It's the Amoeba of the east coast and it's just down 206 from Trenton.
Originally posted by Bagalicious Tangster:
Originally posted by pollard:
American secondhand record shops (like the one in Trenton)
In Trenton?!? I'm gonna be there for a long weekend (family stuff) -- oh, to think there may be some respite to be found.
Love the whole thing, pollard. Really interesting and funny stuff. [/b]
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Originally posted by ggw?:
I'd bet dollars to donuts that they mean The Princeton Record Exchange (http://www.prex.com). It's the Amoeba of the east coast and it's just down 206 from Trenton.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I will be surrounded by about 40 Bagots (my dad grew up in Hightstown, his sister's now in Ewing)...oy vey. The escape will do me good.
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Originally posted by pollard:
Corn syrup (the secret ingredient of everything disgusting, note America, Potato salad does not need corn syrup)
This is so very true... It's hard to avoid this ingredient. Snapple must have corned the market on the stuff.
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Princeton is a great little town for hanging out. I would also recommend Chuck's Spring Street Cafe for the world's best chicken wings (and for the pop culture reference that it was once owned by Lyle Menendez)
Originally posted by Bagalicious Tangster:
Originally posted by ggw?:
I'd bet dollars to donuts that they mean The Princeton Record Exchange (http://www.prex.com). It's the Amoeba of the east coast and it's just down 206 from Trenton.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I will be surrounded by about 40 Bagots (my dad grew up in Hightstown, his sister's now in Ewing)...oy vey. The escape will do me good. [/b]
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Originally posted by ggw?:
[QB] Princeton is a great little town for hanging out. I would also recommend Chuck's Spring Street Cafe for the world's best chicken wings (and for the pop culture reference that it was once owned by Lyle Menendez)
Here we go again.... :roll:
Eaten chicken wings in every country in the world have you?
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Originally posted by Bollocks:
Originally posted by ggw?:
[QB] Princeton is a great little town for hanging out. I would also recommend Chuck's Spring Street Cafe for the world's best chicken wings (and for the pop culture reference that it was once owned by Lyle Menendez)
Here we go again.... ;)
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Originally posted by pollard:
Toby Keith ?? yes the guy who wrote that godawful song about uncle sam kicking your ass a couple of years ago is back with his new song ??Whisky Girl??. The video features a woman in her underwear fixing the engine of a truck. In his dreams?.
I just saw the latest Hank Williams, Jr. video. Do supermodels really dig his shit?
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Originally posted by Bollocks:
Eating fast food out of newspaper.
That one should be on the other list. Grease and ink just don't do it for me when eating food.
Why is it so bad to sit on the upper deck of a double decker bus while it's raining? Do they leak or something?
What's this with potato salad and corn syrup? I've never heard of that in my life. Of course, I don't really like the stuff myself and I'm really only use to the homemade kind.