930 Forums
=> GENERAL DISCUSSION => Topic started by: WALKonBack on August 15, 2021, 12:19:12 pm
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"How did the hipster burn his mouth? . . . He ate the pizza, before it was cool."
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Did you hear about the lady who accidentally walked backwards into the industrial fan? Disaster.
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How do you tell the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
Pay close attention to which one you see in a while, and which you see later.
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What does the echo call its friend?
Buddy-uddy-uddy-uddy-uddy-uddy-uddy-uddy-uddy-uddy-uddy-uddy-uddy-uddy-uddy
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I went out with this woman the other night and she said she wasn't impressed and asked fora 12 inch sub.
I ran out to Subway and got her a roast beef special. She told me she actually wanted Tyrone, the guy who made it .
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What do you call, a gay ghost?
A homospectral.
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Where do bad rainbows go?
Prism
It's a light, sentence.
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walkie, providing me with the ammo to get multiple eye rolls tonight at the dinner table
danke!
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How was, dinner?
Here's another one for your family entertainment.
Did you hear, about the cow who lost her baby?
Yeah . . . she was decalfinated
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Whats it called when Batman skips church?
Christian Bale.
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What, happens to a sailboat in a Category 5 hurricane?
Mast Destruction
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I remember Kenny Loggins. But sometimes I struggle to remember Kenny Passwords.
https://twitter.com/mandapen/status/1432129037753896965?s=21
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(https://scontent-iad3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.6435-9/240582290_403160001146725_5637084769802567845_n.jpg?_nc_cat=107&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=730e14&_nc_ohc=uNBAKNhoDWAAX_NdLHa&_nc_ht=scontent-iad3-1.xx&oh=5d5e12e04cfe3dcdfc31e89eefebb9e7&oe=61561D9A)
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FUN FACT!
Paul McCartney wrote a book in the 60s about Indian yoghurt based dips.
Paperback raita.
https://twitter.com/DadJokeMan/status/1434765435036184578
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(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/E-ZBZEXX0AE_bQX.jpg)
https://twitter.com/desdelboy/status/1433905434851741696?s=21
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Do you know why, the old man fell down the well?
He couldn't see, that well.
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Elton John wanted to send his friends an invite to his house for a fancy evening party but couldn't find the right phrase...
Soiree seems to be the hardest word.
https://twitter.com/DadJokeMan/status/1438441585935532033
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Saw some deer last night at the basketball half-court in the park. They were playing Horse.
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Best news of the week - guarantee that the WFT won't lose on Sunday.
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https://www.instagram.com/p/CT8ylWRMUYT/
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What did the boy say when he saw the cemetery covered in snow?
Icy dead people.
https://www.instagram.com/reel/CVGS7hIpfdl/
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I own a pencil that was once used by William Shakespeare but he chewed it a lot, so I can't tell if it's 2B or not 2B...
https://twitter.com/DadJokeMan/status/1452162306603900932
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What is faster . . . hot or cold?
Faster. You can always catch, a cold.
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Is what is faster . . . hot or cold?
Faster. You can always catch, a cold.
That's hot
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(https://i.ibb.co/86pFmpS/Screen-Shot-2021-11-19-at-8-00-30-PM.png)
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RECOGNIZE:
(https://www.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/959595-61c49092662bc__700.jpg)
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What did Oda Mae Brown, say to Mary on December 24th?
Molly . . . you in manger, gurl.
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Why did the man wear a tuxedo to his vasectomy?
Well, if he's going to be impotent, he might as well look impotent.
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We started a band and called ourselves Books
So no one can judge us by our covers
@dadsaysjokes
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(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/F-WYUqRXoAAwLjd?format=jpg&name=large)
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(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/F-WYUqRXoAAwLjd?format=jpg&name=large)
^ INCORRECT
YYYY/MM/DD is the ONLY acceptable format. on this i will not budge, however i'm willing to negotiate on the slashes.
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(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/E3O2LnjXIAAaoa_.jpg:large)
I recently disposed of 20 so of these! (at an e-waste event of course)