Dad joke, thread

[sweetcell]

^ INCORRECT

YYYY/MM/DD is the ONLY acceptable format.  on this i will not budge, however i'm willing to negotiate on the slashes. 

[SeriousSideFX lııllı|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llıl]

I recently disposed of 20 so of these!  (at an e-waste event of course)

[walk, on bye]

Who do you call, when you need someone to lend a hand?

Jack Hoff

[sweetcell]

what is the leading cause of dry skin?
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towels

[SeriousSideFX lııllı|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llıl]

What do you call it when someone who isn't a dad tells dad jokes?

A faux pa.

[grateful tagle zuppi pizzaboli]

Ok this one made me laugh…

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DDZXbJGorfa/?igsh=aHo1NDdiZTZjanp3

[SeriousSideFX lııllı|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llıl]

*golf clap*

[grateful tagle zuppi pizzaboli]

Gary Numan is 13 days older than Gary Oldman

https://www.instagram.com/p/DDtYQhJOlGT/?igsh=MThibjRqd2t4OGRuMg==

[evilizac]

Yes and at their age, Gary Oldman is looking like Gary, old man.
And whatever Gary Numan has done to his balding pate and his face really did make him look like a new man.

[SeriousSideFX lııllı|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llıl]

My friend tells me he writes songs about sewing machines.

He’s a Singer Songwriter, or sew it seams.

[walk, on bye]

A+,+

[SeriousSideFX lııllı|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llıl]

The fact that many people can't distinguish between entomology and etymology bugs me in ways I can't put into words.

[walk, on bye]

Just heard this one, and it's a banger.

What's Moby Dick's dad name?

Poppa Boner

[sweetcell]

for hutch:

I’m addicted to collecting vintage Beatles albums. I need Help.

[Justin Tonation]

Hot dog spill shuts down highway in Pennsylvania commuters’ wurst nightmare

SHREWSBURY, Pa. (AP) — A truckload of hot dogs spilled across a Pennsylvania interstate Friday after a crash that briefly clogged the heavily traveled artery in both directions.

Crews were stuck with a job they did not relish — rolling up the scattered tube steaks for disposal.