This is what I got when I entered Iron Maiden - sorry Metal Meltdown.:
"Ouch. Aces High will not only remove the enamel from your teeth, but charge you for its professional dental services afterwards. People have accused my reviews of being generated by a computer. Well, of course they are. You think anyone in their right mind would listen to Iron Maiden all day? I'm all digital baby. Like aural herpes, Rime of the Ancient Mariner is only really listenable after carefully inserting your fists into your ears. Don't worry about getting them out again - there's more on this album you'll want to not hear too.
The CD age is a boon to music reviewers - the skip track function was designed specifically to alleviate the sound of track eight, Powerslave. Track 9, Number of the Beast is so so. So, so, so fucking awful, that is. Track eleven, Iron Maiden made my cat sick. Twice. I think I'm going to sue.
In fact, I'm scared Iron Maiden will reproduce and foist a new generation of crud on us."