If you can't see the difference between appearing on the Today Show and the Tonight Show, I can't help you.
Typical guest on the Today Show are very middle of the Road: Sting, Kenny G, Gloria Estafan, Seal, Steve Winwood, Kenny Loggins, etc.
At least the late night shows take some chances and skew toward newer, more cutting edge bands.
I never said appearing on late night shows was selling out. And perhaps I was wrong, appearing on the Today Show is not seeling out any more than the night shows. But it is an indicator that your music is boring and middle of the road.