From NEWS.scotsman.com
Heaven knows we're miserable now
TIM CORNWELL
BRIDGET Jones would love it. An American music writer is to publish a new guide to the most depressing pop songs ever written.
Tom Reynoldsâ?? tongue-in-cheek list of 52 songs ranges from time-honoured weepies like Terry Jackâ??s Seasons In The Sun to Let Her Cry by Hootie And The Blowfish.
It also includes Harry Nillssonâ??s Without You, sung by Mariah Carey, whose lyrics ("I canâ??t live if living is without you") were a favourite of Renee Zellweger in the film Bridget Jonesâ??s Diary.
The list includes not a single known Scottish band, surprising for a country whose art often explores the darker side of life.
Mr Reynoldsâ?? choice of the most depressing song ever is The Christmas Shoes, by a US Christian rock group, Newsong, which has been a big US hit.
Mr Reynoldsâ?? book, titled I Hate Myself and Want to Die, is published in September.
His list ranges from the Celine Dionâ??s All By Myself to Barry Manilowâ??s Mandy. More recent offerings include Bruce Springsteen, the Cure, Smashing Pumpkins and Joy Division.
But rock fans will undoubtedly complain that classic hits have been left out - like Luka, by Suzanne Vega, which topped one internet list of the saddest songs. Don McLeanâ??s Vincent is missing, nor does Led Zeppelin put in an appearance.
Mr Reynolds is a writer and television producer based in Los Angeles. He recently wrote a History of Motorcycle Culture.
Albert Depetrillo, Mr Reynoldsâ?? editor at the Sanctuary Group, said his writing showed the humour of "gonzo" journalist Hunter S Thompson.
Mr Depetrillo said: "This is the first book of its kind. There have been books of songs, but not about this particular topic, and the response has been enormous. Heâ??s just hit a nerve. Everybody seems to have their favourite depressing song and they all want to talk about it.
"He tries to be a bit offbeat with his choices and a bit provocative as well. He divides the book into categories because songs can be depressing for different reasons.
The first section, "I Was A Teenage Car Crash", includes Teenangel by Mark Dinning and Tell Laura I Love Her by Ray Peterson, both tearful teen tales of death on the road from the golden era of rockâ??nâ??roll.
Another category, "Horrifying Remarks of Already Depressing Songs", includes All by Myself and Without You, along with Landslide by Smashing Pumpkins and Send In The Clowns by "everybody".
The section "Iâ??m Trying to be Profound and Touching but Really Suck At It" includes Round Here by Counting Crows and Donâ??t Cry Out Loud by Melissa Manchester.
The Christmas Shoes, first released in 2000, has become a perennial hit in the US and even inspired a television film starring Rob Lowe. Newsong have recorded more than 13 albums.
Mr Reynolds says he first heard about it from a friend as the song she always heard in department stores during the Christmas holidays.
He claimed the "diabolically depressing" song was "more depressing than The Cureâ??s entire career", and he went into shock after listening to it for the first time.
He writes: "Itâ??s the most depressing song ever written because itâ??s long, criminally insufferable and, worst of all, Christmas themed, which means we will always hear it during the Yuletide season, year after year."
THE MOST DEPRESSING POP SONGS
Tell Laura I Love Her - Ray Peterson
Teen Angel - Mark Dinning
Last Kiss - J Frank Wilson And The Cavaliers
Goodbye To Love - The Carpenters
At Seventeen - Janis Ian
My Immortal - Evanescence
It Must Be Him - Vicki Carr
One - Metallica
Round Here - Counting Crows Lucky Man - Emerson, Lake And Palmer
Beth - Kiss
MacArthur Park - Richard Harris
Don't Cry Out Loud - Melissa Manchester
In The Year 2525 - Zager And Evans
Same Old Lang Syne - Dan Fogelberg
The Rose - Bette Midler
Mandy - Barry Manilow
Captain Jack - Billy Joel
Let Her Cry - Hootie And The Blowfish
Sam Stone - John Prine
Love Will Tear Us Apart - Joy Division
You Don't Bring Me Flowers - Neil Diamond and Barbra Streisand
In The Air Tonight - Phil Collins
Brick - Ben Folds Five
Ruby, Don't Take Your Love To Town - Kenny Rogers And The First Edition
All By Myself - Celine Dion
Without You - Mariah Carey
I Will Always Love You - Whitney Houston
Landslide - Smashing Pumpkins
Send In The Clowns - Everybody
The River - Bruce Springsteen
The Freshmen - The Verve Comfortably Numb - Pink Floyd
The Wreck Of The Edmund Fitzgerald - Gordon Lightfoot
Maggie's Dream - Don Williams
People Who Died - The Jim Carroll Band
Strange Fruit - Billie Holiday
DOA - Bloodrock
Sylviaâ??s Mother - Dr Hook And The Medicine Show
The End - The Doors
Alone Again - Gilbert O'Sullivan
Artificial Flowers - Bobby Darin
Indiana Wants Me - R Dean Taylor
Prayers For Rain - Cure
