Need British-English translation help...

[vansmack]

Mankie or Markie, I'm a bit confused by this story and its accompanying headline, can you help me out?
 
  Young Boys' Wankdorf erection woe
 
 
 Thursday, June 26, 2003
 
 Young Boys' Wankdorf erection woe
 
 BERNE, Switzerland, June 26 (Reuters) - Young Boys have been forced to play a UEFA Cup qualifier with Finnish side MyPa away from their Neufeld home after European soccer's governing body UEFA refused to allow temporary seating.
 
 Young Boys, who host MyPa in the second leg on August 28, said on Thursday UEFA has not granted either their request to allow supporters to stand or for makeshift stands to be erected at the 6,800-capacity Neufeld stadium.
 
 The Neufeld is being used as an temporary home while Young Boys' new Wankdorf stadium, which will become the Swiss national team's home, is built following the demolition of their previous home.
 
 Young Boys said they are in talks to play the game in Lausanne, Basel or Zurich. A decision must be made before July 8.

[mankie]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHA HAHA HA HA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HA HA OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHH AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA,
 
 and it's not even April 1st.
 
 I Think it means that the Swiss would be a bunch of wankers if only they could get erections.

[vansmack]

Whomever wrote that needs a promotion immediately.  I never could have gotten that out - I spit my Mountain Dew all over my monitor when I read that!

[Venerable Bede]

Originally posted by vansmack:
  Whomever wrote that needs a promotion immediately.  I never could have gotten that out - I spit my Mountain Dew all over my monitor when I read that!

dude, that wasn't mountain dew.

[vansmack]

Originally posted by Venerable Bede:
  dude, that wasn't mountain dew.

Dude, you're gross (but it was Live Wire, the new stuff so I'm certain that it was).  Although, now that I've cleaned it up, it is just as sticky as my keyboard at home, where I've never spilt Mountain Dew.

[mankie]

Originally posted by vansmack:
 

 
  it is just as sticky as my keyboard at home, where I've never spilt Mountain Dew.
 
  [/b]

You need to get one of those keyboard condom thingies.