Things Smackie Thinks You Need to Know...

[vansmack]

Without a doubt, this has the potential to be my new favorite show:

Fly Girls

The CW Joins Forces with Virgin America for Series Following the Lives "five beautiful Jet Setting Virgin America flight attendants."

Yep.   A guaranteed Smackie Approved show before it even hits the air waves....

[sweetcell]

interesting.  this show seems to harken back to a by-gone era, and/or plays on people's stereotypes: based on acquaintances in the industry, the life of a flight attendant isn't that glamorous.

great product placement, branson (or whoever came up with this) is a genius.

where exactly are they going to fit the cameras?  will a camera-man, cable guy and mic operator all follow these attendants around as they work?  the aisle on an airplane are crowded enough as it is!

[Julian, Alleged Computer F**kface]

Mad Men indicates to me that all flight attendants turn up having their coitus with Don Draper interrupted by a fire alarm. If the show follows that path, hello, Dolly!

[nkotb]

Even I get a little giddy thinking about coitus with Drapper.  Grrrrrowl!

Mad Men indicates to me that all flight attendants turn up having their coitus with Don Draper interrupted by a fire alarm. If the show follows that path, hello, Dolly!

[Julian, Alleged Computer F**kface]

Even I get a little giddy thinking about coitus with Drapper.  Grrrrrowl!

Mad Men indicates to me that all flight attendants turn up having their coitus with Don Draper interrupted by a fire alarm. If the show follows that path, hello, Dolly!

That's what I'm talking about!

[thirsty moore]

Mad Men's made me want to step up my clothing situation.

[nkotb]

Agreed...and to that, I'll drink during work and smoke. Honest to god, smoking really does LOOK cool!

Mad Men's made me want to step up my clothing situation.

[Julian, Alleged Computer F**kface]

If I ever have a daughter and she wants to play with tools, I will call her a lesbian... JUST LIKE JANUARY JONES DID!!

[vansmack]

I'll comment on this discussion in a little while, but righg now I've got bigger problems...

Last night sweetcell visited my lovely city and we got housed on a bottle of wine and a few glasses on top of that.  I woke up in a panic this morning because I'm pretty sure I fucked up the tip.  Smackette usually handles the tip, but she wasn't there last night. I'm not cheap, I'm just an idiot, and that idiocy is amplified when I'm drunk. In my defense, I was also distracted by some ugly chick who took issue with something I said, though even now I have no idea what it was. I maintain my innocence.

Anyway, what's the proper protocol to handle this tip situation?

[brennser]

Anyway, what's the proper protocol to handle this tip situation?

Call the restaurant and ask.....if you did stiff 'em, its easy to make amends AND you'll probably end up getting special treatment for as long as you go there....

[vansmack]

Since there's no website for stuff like this....

TEXTSFROMTHISMORNING

6:41AM Smackie: Did I get you back to Caltrain last night?
7:07AM Sweetcell: Yup.  Unfortunately, passed out and woke up in San Jose.  Good time.
7:11AM Smackie: No shit! Was it early enough to take a train back or did you have to cab it?
7:34AM Sweetcell: Had to cab it.  Kind of tired right now.  That girl from the bar last night was ridiculous.
7:38AM Smackie: I'm pretty sure I fucked up the tip - not my strong suit.  I'm thinking of sending Mrs. Venerable down to rectify.  Whiskey is not good for me...Sorry about the cab ride.  Next time you stay in the city.
7:42AM Sweetcell: Whiskey is awesome for you!  I may currently be the least productive meeting attendee EVAR.  Getting knowing looks.
7:46AM Smackie: You're welcome.
8:19AM Sweetcell: Today is about to suck.
8:20AM Sweetcell: Confirmed.
8:21AM Smackie:  I'm about to drive.  This might not be a good idea.
8:50AM Sweetcell: Just had a flashback from last night: got to Caltrain with 20 minutes to spare so I crossed the street and got some sake.  Not too proud of that decision right now.
9:49AM Director: So I pose this question to you...which one of you feels more like shit today?  Cause when I talked to Smackie last night at like 10:30 y'all were WASTED.
10:46AM Smackie: We talked?  No shit...
1047AM Director: WASTED.

[godsshoeshine]

hahaha

about a month ago i was at my local and had a few too many. i remembered paying but when i woke up the next morning still clothed, i had the receipt i filled out still in my pants (the numbers were not really legible)

they tacked on a well deserved fat tip

if theres a way for a drunk to screw up a bill, i'm sure theyve seen it before

[sweetcell]

In my defense, I was also distracted by some ugly chick who took issue with something I said, though even now I have no idea what it was. I maintain my innocence.

you were innocent.  she was an attention-whore, desperate for validation.  she came barging in and acted rude, you called her out on it, she started bitching and calling you a meanie, you apologized at which point her eyes lit up a la "oh gosh so you like me?  you really actually like me?!?", to which you answered "no", which brought her right back to her bitchy mood.  i too forget exactly what you said, but it was a very valid observation and she was asking for it.

that text message thread is EPIC.  thanks for putting it together, as a whole it's quite an oeuvre.  i would however like to point out that i didn't make all those typos.  even when hung over my texting is impeccable. 

[vansmack]

you were innocent.  she was an attention-whore, desperate for validation.  she came barging in and acted rude, you called her out on it, she started bitching and calling you a meanie, you apologized at which point her eyes lit up a la "oh gosh so you like me?  you really actually like me?!?", to which you answered "no", which brought her right back to her bitchy mood.  i too forget exactly what you said, but it was a very valid observation and she was asking for it.

This is my story and I'm sticking too it.  Whiskey Smackie is the KING of not remembering things...

And the typos are all mine.  I was in a hurry to get them up before I went to a meeting.  And I want to flash my phone.  It's a problem, I know.

[sweetcell]

tequila sweetcell will challenge you for that crown.  i really need to stay away from the stuff.

we were billed for 2 tequila shots that neither of us remember consuming.  it was that kind of a night.