Need help, trying to get an autograph for best friend's birthday

[sgoldberg08]

I will do this for Arfin.

I applaud your investigative skills, very impressive. But unfortunately my amazing dog is not on the table.

[i am gay and i like cats]

well . . . this just got a lot more, interesting.

[sgoldberg08]

To clarify a couple things: 

1. I actually am not going to the show.  That's why I was hoping to connect with someone with access to the band, like perhaps backstage before they go on.

2. If you were to choose cash, I was thinking around $100.  But who knows, I may be so appreciative in the moment that I might throw in a little extra.

[Julian, Bespoke SEXPERT]

If there's anything I'm proud of myself about in the Julian II era, its that I've inspired so many to research the email addresses of anyone new who shows up. You just know someone is calling this guy's law firm at some point today. 

[sgoldberg08]

I could easily achieve this task for you, but I only accept payment in limbs. The glaring omission of "my left leg" from your list of payment options renders me unwilling to assist you.

If limbs is truly what you're after, I'd opt for the first born.

[Yada]

If there's anything I'm proud of myself about in the Julian II era, its that I've inspired so many to research the email addresses of anyone new who shows up. You just know someone is calling this guy's law firm at some point today. 

Wait... you think you created the innovative technique of searching an email address?

KUDOS TO YOU SIR, JULIAN!

[Julian, Bespoke SEXPERT]

2. If you were to choose cash, I was thinking around $100.  But who knows, I may be so appreciative in the moment that I might throw in a little extra.

For $100, I will be glad to go on ebay, purchase you an autograph for $40-50 (which seems to be the going rate) and ship it to you first class. Are my terms acceptable?

[Dejecty-hatch lııllı|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llıl]

[Julian, Bespoke SEXPERT]

Wait... you think you created the innovative technique of searching an email address?

I think I've made it vogue to do so within the limited range of this community, yes.

[Yada]

Wait... you think you created the innovative technique of searching an email address?

I think I've made it trendy to do so within the limited range of this community, yes.

lolzbro

[sgoldberg08]

2. If you were to choose cash, I was thinking around $100.  But who knows, I may be so appreciative in the moment that I might throw in a little extra.

For $100, I will be glad to go on ebay, purchase you an autograph for $40-50 (which seems to be the going rate) and ship it to you first class. Are my terms acceptable?

That's an option I've explored myself, but I would always wonder if it was legit or not.  Plus it'd make for a pretty shitty story if she asked how I got it.

[Julian, Bespoke SEXPERT]

I would always wonder if it was legit or not.  Plus it'd make for a pretty shitty story if she asked how I got it.

To be fair, you're asking random people on the internet to get it for you. Both of those issues are still very much in play.

[sgoldberg08]

I would always wonder if it was legit or not.  Plus it'd make for a pretty shitty story if she asked how I got it.

To be fair, you're asking random people on the internet to get it for you. Both of those issues are still very much in play.

It's a risk that can't be completely avoided.  Best I can do is minimize it, and I thought this approach might be a good way to do that.

[i am gay and i like cats]

oh yeah . . . this thread has caught fyer.

[Julian, Bespoke SEXPERT]

Best I can do is minimize it, and I thought this approach might be a good way to do that.

I would trust a reputable ebay seller selling an item that appears similar to an untrained eye to google image searched examples of the band's autograph way before I would trust the hooligans that frequent this place. I mean, you showed up and people had your dog's name and your employer in like 4 minutes. You want to send us money? Your address? This is as dangerous as a diabetic swimming in a vat of pure, unadulterated cane sugar.