Author Topic: Parenting issues  (Read 67071 times)

Yada

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Re: Parenting issues
« Reply #165 on: June 30, 2021, 01:29:21 pm »
My 14 year old is home all summer. No classes, no camps, no job, no responsibilities.

I am also home all summer, working 8-9 hours per day, doing a long dogwalk after work, and cooking dinner four nights a week.

Is it too much to ask my kid to wash her own dishes and clean up her messes she makes when she makes herself breakfast or lunch?

No,  but you should also encourage/force your child to do some activities or sign her up for things

sweetcell

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Re: Parenting issues
« Reply #166 on: June 30, 2021, 01:44:05 pm »
yes, at 14 she can clean her own dishes.  personally i think she should be doing a little more, but that's up to you.

and +1 for getting her involved in something.  it'll be beneficial for both her and her parents.  she likes art, doesn't she?  sign her up for a drawing camp, a sculpting school, a weekly pottery workshop... something.
<sig>

Re: Parenting issues
« Reply #167 on: June 30, 2021, 01:52:52 pm »
I did notice those who don't actually have teen agers have responded....let's touch base when you have one ;)
slack

Yada

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Re: Parenting issues
« Reply #168 on: June 30, 2021, 01:59:15 pm »
I did notice those who don't actually have teen agers have responded....let's touch base when you have one ;)

I may be jumping to some conclusions but based on much evidence posted on this here forum over the past 17 years, I suspect Space and I may parent quite differently...

Re: Parenting issues
« Reply #169 on: June 30, 2021, 02:01:37 pm »
I did notice those who don't actually have teen agers have responded....let's touch base when you have one ;)

I may be jumping to some conclusions but based on much evidence posted on this here forum over the past 17 years, I suspect Space and I may parent quite differently...
true, but the way you parent kids under 7 is quite different to teens...trust me
you can lead them to water, but you can't make them drink...no matter how much you want to or think it would be 'good for them'

these phones and constant access is quite the parental dilemma that past experience has no impact
« Last Edit: June 30, 2021, 02:03:34 pm by Side-estoppel ıll|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llıl »
slack

Yada

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Re: Parenting issues
« Reply #170 on: June 30, 2021, 02:05:45 pm »
I did notice those who don't actually have teen agers have responded....let's touch base when you have one ;)

I may be jumping to some conclusions but based on much evidence posted on this here forum over the past 17 years, I suspect Space and I may parent quite differently...
true, but the way you parent kids under 7 is quite different to teens...trust me
you can lead them to water, but you can't make them drink...no matter how much you want to or think it would be 'good for them'

these phones and constant access is quite the parental dilemma that past experience has no impact

My fear is Space's child has not interacted with another human other than him and his wife in the past 16 months and prolonging that will do no one any good.

Space Freely

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Re: Parenting issues
« Reply #171 on: June 30, 2021, 02:06:18 pm »
Yeah, it's a little late to sign up for activities now. We're three weeks into the summer and have three weeks of travel upcoming (two separate trips.) It was kind of hard planning for summer activities when we didn't know what the vaccine situation was going to be.

We did sign up for a pool membership, and chose the farther away of the two pools, necessitating a bike ride to get for her to get to the pool.

This is a kid who is so lazy, she was lamenting to me poolside yesterday what a pain clothes are "First you have to pick them out, then you have to put them on, it's sooooo much work."

She did a acquire a Bob's Burger's cookbook. So she has decided to eat her own burgers for dinner every day, instead of eating the meal dad is cooking.

 I told her that's fine, but she needs to clean up her dishes and messes (she tend to leave everything strewn across counters and stovetops, with spills and dirty dishes galore.) But my wife insists (to the point of yelling at me)that she (daughter) shouldn't have to do her dishes, it's my responsibility since I'm in charge of preparing the meal.

I mean, sure, I might do her dishes for her if she were in school and had homework to get to. Or had camp. Or did a sport and had double practices going on. Or did other chores. Or read a fucking book ("I don't want to read a book, I read articles on my phone.") Or did anything other than sit on the fucking couch watching cartoons and making sugar concoctions all day, every single day (*except on weekends when she makes her mom take her to the mall to buy her crap, or to the boba shop to get boba, or to dunkin donuts or starbucks for sugar covered coffee.)

Space Freely

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Re: Parenting issues
« Reply #172 on: June 30, 2021, 02:08:09 pm »
I did notice those who don't actually have teen agers have responded....let's touch base when you have one ;)

I may be jumping to some conclusions but based on much evidence posted on this here forum over the past 17 years, I suspect Space and I may parent quite differently...

I'm not part of a family where I'm really allowed much input as a parent. My job is to back my wife up. At least that's what I'm told.

Julian, Forum COGNOSCENTI

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Re: Parenting issues
« Reply #173 on: June 30, 2021, 02:11:18 pm »
My fear is Space's child has not interacted with another human other than him and his wife in the past 16 months and prolonging that will do no one any good.
I've been secretly opening my own publishing house so they day she turns 18, I can get one of my ghost-writers to get her memoirs to market.
LVMH

Space Freely

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Re: Parenting issues
« Reply #174 on: June 30, 2021, 02:13:28 pm »
I did notice those who don't actually have teen agers have responded....let's touch base when you have one ;)

I may be jumping to some conclusions but based on much evidence posted on this here forum over the past 17 years, I suspect Space and I may parent quite differently...
true, but the way you parent kids under 7 is quite different to teens...trust me
you can lead them to water, but you can't make them drink...no matter how much you want to or think it would be 'good for them'

these phones and constant access is quite the parental dilemma that past experience has no impact

My fear is Space's child has not interacted with another human other than him and his wife in the past 16 months and prolonging that will do no one any good.

Except for a couple of playdates with one friend, this is essentially true. Not because of any restrictions we put on her, but simply because she had so few friends before the pandemic.

Yada

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Re: Parenting issues
« Reply #175 on: June 30, 2021, 02:18:07 pm »
My fear is Space's child has not interacted with another human other than him and his wife in the past 16 months and prolonging that will do no one any good.
I've been secretly opening my own publishing house so they day she turns 18, I can get one of my ghost-writers to get her memoirs to market.

 :D :D :D


I did notice those who don't actually have teen agers have responded....let's touch base when you have one ;)

I may be jumping to some conclusions but based on much evidence posted on this here forum over the past 17 years, I suspect Space and I may parent quite differently...
true, but the way you parent kids under 7 is quite different to teens...trust me
you can lead them to water, but you can't make them drink...no matter how much you want to or think it would be 'good for them'

these phones and constant access is quite the parental dilemma that past experience has no impact

My fear is Space's child has not interacted with another human other than him and his wife in the past 16 months and prolonging that will do no one any good.

Except for a couple of playdates with one friend, this is essentially true. Not because of any restrictions we put on her, but simply because she had so few friends before the pandemic.

 :'( :'( Further evidence she should be involved in something... band, art, sports (doesn't sound likely), gaming club, whatever.
« Last Edit: June 30, 2021, 02:24:32 pm by Yada »

Re: Parenting issues
« Reply #176 on: June 30, 2021, 02:36:04 pm »
trust me idle time is the devil's playground with teens....so it's really good to tap into what they like and get options available
that can be a tough nut to crack with mopey, ornery teens
sometimes $$ helps
slack

Space Freely

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Re: Parenting issues
« Reply #177 on: June 30, 2021, 02:51:58 pm »
trust me idle time is the devil's playground with teens....so it's really good to tap into what they like and get options available
that can be a tough nut to crack with mopey, ornery teens
sometimes $$ helps

Thanks for that advice. Don't disagree with any of it. She did just pocket $1000 for getting straight A's on each of her quarterly report cards. That said, how do I get her to wash the extra dishes she dirties, especially when her mother says she shouldn't have to wash them?

Re: Parenting issues
« Reply #178 on: June 30, 2021, 02:54:08 pm »
trust me idle time is the devil's playground with teens....so it's really good to tap into what they like and get options available
that can be a tough nut to crack with mopey, ornery teens
sometimes $$ helps

Thanks for that advice. Don't disagree with any of it. She did just pocket $1000 for getting straight A's on each of her quarterly report cards. That said, how do I get her to wash the extra dishes she dirties, especially when her mother says she shouldn't have to wash them?
parents gotta sing from the same song sheet when it comes to chores/discipline

I'm struggling with it too, as I'm happy the kids are making their own food, but ends up being more work for me

I will say getting straight As durring the pandemic was a lot easier than most years
slack

Yada

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Re: Parenting issues
« Reply #179 on: June 30, 2021, 02:54:49 pm »
trust me idle time is the devil's playground with teens....so it's really good to tap into what they like and get options available
that can be a tough nut to crack with mopey, ornery teens
sometimes $$ helps

Thanks for that advice. Don't disagree with any of it. She did just pocket $1000 for getting straight A's on each of her quarterly report cards. That said, how do I get her to wash the extra dishes she dirties, especially when her mother says she shouldn't have to wash them?

Jesus titty! Last thing I would ever expect.

A grand for getting srtaight A's??? Get her in some dorky smart club then!