When reality reflects The Onion (redux)

[DeathFromAbove1979]

punk rock's very own Onion: The Hard Times

examples:
Henry Rollins Driving App Tells You How Hard It Would Have Been to Get There in the 80’s
Health-Conscious Punks Begin Vaping Glue
etc...

Holy fuck ^^^^
HAHAHAH!!!

[betao]

The Henry Rollins driving app story was gold.

[DeathFromAbove1979]

The Henry Rollins driving app story was gold.

Has anyone read the comments? Lol. It's all people asking for a different language on the website lol.

[sweetcell]

The Henry Rollins driving app story was gold.

Has anyone read the comments? Lol. It's all people asking for a different language on the website lol.

those aren't people, those are bots automatically posting the same message.

there is another comments section above, with "real" comments.  much funnier, several people wrote additional directions from Hank

[Justin Tonation]

Florida Cop Too Drunk to Collect Prize From Mothers Against Drunk Driving

[sweetcell]

not entirely sure that this story belongs here, but you folks have a right to know:

?Jem and the Holograms? movie pulled from theatres after dismal two-week run
http://globalnews.ca/news/2330281/jem-and-the-holograms-pulled-from-theatres-after-dismal-two-week-run/

why is it that it takes a canadian news outlet to report this hard-hitting news?  are american news corporations all in the back pocket of Big Movies?  (oh wait, this wasn't a big movie... nevermind)

[Dejecty-hatch lııllı|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llıl]

wow...some great quotes too

It?s not all that much for a studio the size of Universal, but Jem and the Holograms now holds the distinction of having one of the worst openings in film history.


?This is unprecedented, and shows just how badly this film flopped. Not only is it the lowest-grossing debut for a studio film this year, but it?s the worst all-time ? by a considerable margin ? for any film released in 2,000-plus theatres.?

[Justin Tonation]

I hadn't seen this until today:



It's an Amazon "Dash" button for ordering stuff. There's a couple dozen of them, each for 5 bucks which is refunded with first orders, but they're only available to Prime customers. I'm gonna buy one just for its kitsch value.

[Julian, Bespoke SEXPERT]

I hadn't seen this until today:



It's an Amazon "Dash" button for ordering stuff. There's a couple dozen of them, each for 5 bucks which is refunded with first orders, but they're only available to Prime customers. I'm gonna buy one just for its kitsch value.

I understand these for, like, cleaning supplies or diapers. But how much macaroni and cheese are people eating!?

[Dejecty-hatch lııllı|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llıl]

this seems more appropriate for the older boardies



They really need one for Beer and Condoms...although those would need to be same day delivery

[Dejecty-hatch lııllı|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llıl]

I hadn't seen this until today:



It's an Amazon "Dash" button for ordering stuff. There's a couple dozen of them, each for 5 bucks which is refunded with first orders, but they're only available to Prime customers. I'm gonna buy one just for its kitsch value.

I understand these for, like, cleaning supplies or diapers. But how much macaroni and cheese are people eating!?

Dash Button responds only to your first press until your order is delivered.
that's a good feature...as I could imagine after a party getting 200 boxes of Mac and Cheese

because if I ever was in the humble abode of Julian, I would press that button 200 times

[Justin Tonation]

They also have one for Gatorade but it's just the current G logo, which is boring. If someone who didn't know the logo saw it they'd have no idea what a "G" button does.

[DeathFromAbove1979]

There's one for Orbit gum lol. Who the hell needs gum in a jiff like that?

[Julian, Bespoke SEXPERT]

There's one for Orbit gum lol. Who the hell needs gum in a jiff like that?

My bigger question is who is going through gum at that sort of frenetic pace? Same thing as the mac and cheese: you just ate mac and cheese for dinner. Why do you need touch of a button, next-day delivery of mass quantities of mac and cheese? How many days in a row are you eating mac and cheese!?

[Julian, Bespoke SEXPERT]

They also have one for Gatorade but it's just the current G logo, which is boring. If someone who didn't know the logo saw it they'd have no idea what a "G" button does.

I actually triggers a member of G Unit coming to your house and rapping.