When reality reflects The Onion (redux)

[Julian, Bespoke SEXPERT]

Look at that girl. I don't believe for one second she was eating less than 50% of that order.

[Dejecty-hatch lııllı|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llıl]

so you can buy Hef's Playboy mansion for $200mil...the catch is you have to let him live there until he dies

[betao]

"Here's a better photo of me" - Ohio man with warrants sends police a better-looking picture for mugshot

http://wric.com/2016/01/12/here-is-a-better-photo-ohio-man-unhappy-with-mug-shot-sends-new-pic-to-police/

[Dejecty-hatch lııllı|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llıl]

"Here's a better photo of me" - Ohio man with warrants sends police a better-looking picture for mugshot

http://wric.com/2016/01/12/here-is-a-better-photo-ohio-man-unhappy-with-mug-shot-sends-new-pic-to-police/

well his original mugshot was pretty bad

but come on with the glasses...

I did find this classic mugshot though

[grateful]

"Here's a better photo of me" - Ohio man with warrants sends police a better-looking picture for mugshot

http://wric.com/2016/01/12/here-is-a-better-photo-ohio-man-unhappy-with-mug-shot-sends-new-pic-to-police/

well his original mugshot was pretty bad

but come on with the glasses...

First I was like, Alfonso Ribiero got arrested?!?

[Justin Tonation]

"Here's a better photo of me" - Ohio man with warrants sends police a better-looking picture for mugshot

http://wric.com/2016/01/12/here-is-a-better-photo-ohio-man-unhappy-with-mug-shot-sends-new-pic-to-police/

Busted!

[killsaly]

Angry Militia Leader: Stop Mailing Us Dildos
http://gawker.com/angry-militia-leader-stop-mailing-us-dildos-1752580458

[Justin Tonation]

h/t @LaurelHalo

[Justin Tonation]

h/t @matdryhurst

[Julian, Bespoke SEXPERT]

h/t @matdryhurst

To be fair, daily beatings toughens one up at some point.

[Space Freely]

Is this the right thread for this one?
Maybe I should start a "Religions suck" thread.

http://nytlive.nytimes.com/womenintheworld/2016/01/15/indian-high-court-to-rule-on-accepting-menstruating-women-in-places-of-worship/

[walk,on,by]

you were molested, by a priest, weren't you?

[Julian, Bespoke SEXPERT]

you were molested, by a priest, weren't you?

Gurrrrrrrl. . .

[Space Freely]

you were molested, by a priest, weren't you?

No, but I was repeatedly told that god impregnated a woman mary who had a son named jesus who walked on water and died on a cross to save me from my sins and if i didn't believe it i was going to burn in hell. how is that for lack of punctuation?

I've never even met a priest as best i can remember.

[walk,on,by]

you don't believe in jesus?  you do know, that jesus invented beer?  at least, thats what i heard.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KwSVskQW3Uo