Where do you get the wacky notion that shock and awe killed 6k civilians?
Also --
You are confusing the issue.
If the war was just, then the collateral damage, unfortunate as it is, 6k dead civilians, 60k dead civilians, is just as well. think of a just war -- how about ww2? the allies killed alot of innocent civilians. that doesn't mean the allies were equivalent to terrorists.
If the war was unjust, then the deaths of innocent civilians is unjust.
However, even in that latter scenario, the purpose of the war -- even if it is a bad purpose (oil, revenge, whatever you want to believe) -- was not to kill innocent civilians. And that is what differentiates it from terrorism.
As for the al qaeda deaths, which grotty first complained about but dropped, they unquestionably deserve to die and i hope we kill more of them. as many as possible. members of al qaeda are dedicated to killing us, after all. it would be irrational to want them to live.