The Great Headline thread

[nkotb]

Iron Maiden’s Bruce Dickinson to star in ABBA-inspired horror movie ‘Bjorn Of The Dead’

[sweetcell]

[grateful]

Tasmanian woman tells office she can't come in as 600kg 'Neil the seal' is blocking her car

[kosmo vinyl]

Raunchy, alcohol-fueled L.A. Taco Bell party included open sex, lawsuit claims

[Space Freely]

‘I have frozen my penis,’ says Swedish cross-country skier Calle Halfvarsson after racing in icy temperatures


https://www.cnn.com/2023/11/27/sport/calle-halfvarsson-frozen-penis-skiing-spt-intl/index.html

[kosmo vinyl]

Man accused of stealing MARTA bus, dropping off customers at Waffle House

[kosmo vinyl]

Woman Enters MRI Machine With A Gun, Gets Shot In Butt

[Dejecty-hatch lııllı|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llıl]

From ‘puff, puff pass’ to ‘puff, puff police:’ Critics frown on Ohio House’s proposed changes to recreational marijuana

[kosmo vinyl]

Gang jailed for £1m cocaine-coated broom handle plot

[kosmo vinyl]

as the Angry People in Local Newspapers social media accounts put it “I’m not quite dead”



‘I’m still alive’ declares Angus man after discovering his own grave in cemetery

this whole story is amazing

Mr Hattel said he had realised something was not right because his social life has been deathly quiet for the past three or four months.

He said: “People think that I’m dead.

“My phone hasn’t rung for three or four months. I’ve been confused by it all but now I know why nobody has been calling.

Plot Twist

“I don’t even want to be buried – I plan to be cremated.”

He has put the blame for the headstone at the door of his ex-wife, from whom he separated some 26 years ago.

https://www.thecourier.co.uk/fp/news/angus-mearns/1092665/human-interest-im-still-alive-declares-angus-man-after-discovering-his-own-grave-in-cemetery/

[sweetcell]

He has put the blame for the headstone at the door of his ex-wife, from whom he separated some 26 years ago.

women!  can live with 'em, can't be alive without them...

[Justin Tonation]

Crikey!

Massive flood in Australia strands hundreds, prompts crocodile warnings

[Justin Tonation]

Crikey!

Massive flood in Australia strands hundreds, prompts crocodile warnings

Looks serious, but not serious enough that it can't have a jovial photographer's signature!

[grateful]

NASA laser message beams video of a cat named Taters back to Earth, and it’s a big deal

[Dejecty-hatch lııllı|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llıl]

Finally!


Illinois enacts law to legalizing fuzzy dice hanging from rearview mirrors